Dear Self

06 Apr

Tomorrow you will line up at the starting line of your second 5k.  You will feel a little nervous, a little out of place and a little excitement.  You will breath in the energy of all the runners around you.  In that moment the excitement will be replaced with self doubt.

‘There’s no way you can make it a whole mile without stopping to walk, and even if you do, you will be “running” slower than a walk,’ ‘3 miles is a long way, why even bother trying?’ ‘There are people waiting to congratulate you at the finish line, and for what?’ ‘What makes you think you’re anything close to an athlete?’ ‘Everyone is looking at you, they know you don’t belong here.’  ‘You let yourself get to this point.’ ‘You are fat, you’re slow and you’re wasting yours (and all those who came to support you) time.’

You know this is what you will do, because they’re thoughts that go through your mind all the time.  For so many years, you have allowed yourself to think only the worst of yourself.  These thoughts of never being good enough are likely what got you here in the first place.  You don’t even know where these thoughts came from.  It’s not like you haven’t always had people in your life supporting you, telling you, you’re always better than good enough.  Everyone around you has always seen your potential and they see it still, and it’s time for you to start seeing it for yourself.

When those thoughts start to wonder into your head at the starting line tomorrow, think of this instead.  You’re so much further than you were less than 6 months ago.  Even standing at the starting line is an improvement.  Anything is better than sitting on the couch wasting precious moments being nothing but a shell.  With every step you take, you’re not only closer to the finish line, but closer to the person you used to know, closer to the athlete you are inside, and closer to believing it for yourself. 

Give it everything you have.  Don’t sell yourself short.  When you think you’re to the point you can’t go any further, you can, and you have before.  You can do so much more than you think you can.  You have survived through many things and this, in comparison, is nothing. 

This is for you.  That’s probably why you have such a hard time putting all of you into it.  If it was for your children, your husband, your sister, parent or friend you would give it 150%.  You may have forgotten, but you are worth it!  You are worth every step, every breath, every mile, every minute. 

No more excuses!  No more putting yourself in the position to come in last! 

At the end of the day, at the end of the race, it won’t matter what place you came in, it won’t matter how long it took you to run 3 miles, it won’t make any difference how many people passed you along the way.  What matters is there are people waiting there that love you and believe in you.  There are people who are proud of you, and somewhere in the midst of all of them, you just might find yourself.


Posted by on April 6, 2013 in Uncategorized


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5 responses to “Dear Self

  1. Kristi

    April 6, 2013 at 5:38 pm

    It’s hard but my rule is to never ever say anything to myself (in my head or out loud) I wouldn’t say to my family or friends who were doing the same thing. I pretend I’m talking to a friend and all of a sudden it’s all positive or at the very least nicely constructive & not mean. 😉 You’ll do great! 🙂

  2. MyMagicPill

    April 6, 2013 at 10:37 pm

    Fantastic! I signed up for my first 5k and may just need to remind myself of much of what you’ve written here that morning!

  3. phil alteri

    April 7, 2013 at 12:30 am

    You are amazing. I am so inspired by you every day. I love you


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