So here is one of my many vices…fast food. I would go as far as saying I am addicted. I have heard people say that the longer they go without it, the worse it tastes to them and I so wish that was the case for me. Before I started my weight loss journey my typical trip for fast food included a double cheeseburger, 4 piece chicken nugget and fries. There were days that after eating that, I would go to another fast food restaurant (so I wouldn’t be embarrassed by going around the window twice) and order another double cheeseburger. Oh, and don’t forget the diet Coke, because of course diet anything makes a difference when that is what you’re eating.
While working to get to goal weight, I wouldn’t allow myself to do that. Any fast food trip I made was salad with light or fat free dressing and the occasional order of fries. To ease some of the craving I would allow myself one bite of whatever my husband was having (he now says it doesn’t taste the same unless I have taken a bite).
So now I have been at goal for about 10 months. I have slowly allowed myself to eat a little more of my favorite fast foods, but here’s the problem. The more of it I eat, the more of it I want to eat. The other day after scarfing a double cheese burger I was tempted to go around the window and get another one. It terrified me. I think it’s time to quit cold turkey. No more just a little bite here, just one burger there. I know there are things about my former diet that will come back to haunt me now that my focus isn’t entirely on losing weight but on maintaining. I’ve found that to be even harder the more I run and the further my distance it. I convince myself I earned it, and I burned way more than that running. While the numbers on the scale haven’t moved upward, I know those ‘rewards’ are not helping my runs, but in fact hurting them.
So there it is, my confession for the day. I will not hide it like I used to, I will own it and change it and that is what will make all the difference for me.