It is no secret it has been a while since my last post. Time has flown and a lot has changed but yet so much has stayed the same. I’m still struggling with the same demons when it comes to diet and things have been a whole lot more challenging in that department since August.
In August we found out we were expecting the miracle of baby number 3. Losing weight obviously eliminated my fertility problems. We had tried for over a year for our first and 3 years for our second with a year on fertility meds. I was convinced I could never be surprised by a pregnancy. Those who have struggled know he window is small. I am certain this was a mush higher power working in our lives.
Here I sit 9 months later, holding our beautiful baby girl. She has completed our family. My pregnancy with her was a cake walk, in the health department and LITERALLY in the weight department. I allowed myself to indulge on all the things I had cut from my diet for so long. I went through waves of working my doctor’s approved version of Weight Watchers only to flop on my face into sleeves of Oreo cookies, mountains of pork fried rice and miles of melty pizza cheese. It was delicious, disgusting and so totally worth it.
This face was worth every craving I caved on, every zumba class I had to sit out (doctor’s orders at about 5 months), every tear I cried over clothes that didn’t fit, every pants size between goal and where I am now; it was worth starting over for. While my clothes from when I started my weight loss journey are much too large, my goal jeans I can’t even pull up past my knees. I’m struggling to find the motivation to do anything other than nap, snuggle and love my boys and our baby girl.
I know I’ll get there, but I know it’s going to take me some time, and probably a long time. I was happy at goal, but right now I’m euphoric. I have come a long way from the number I started out at on the scale, but there are other things that never changed and more than likely, never will and I’m OK with that. There is more to life than counting calories and I’ll get back to that tomorrow.