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I Think I Can

This coming weekend is what will likely be my last 5K until next spring.  If you’ve seen any of my past posts about running, this is not my favorite activity, but when I started running for the first time this spring, I set a goal of running an entire 5K without stopping to walk.

I was on quite a roll for a while and have managed I think four races so far this year.  One of the last ones I did, I was so close to that goal I thought it would be a cake walk to accomplish my goal.  Now here I am, at the end of September, with one last 5K  I’m signed up for and I have yet to accomplish that goal.

The first 5K’s that I ran I didn’t really do any training.  I went for one run a week and when I started I couldn’t even go a mile without stopping to walk.  At one point, I knew I could go 2.5 miles, no problem without stopping to walk, and then I stopped running.  Apparently even once a week was better than no at all.  This past couple of weeks I have tried really hard to get back in the swing and to get my distance back up there.  At this point, I’m back up to 2.3 miles, but I’m struggling.

I think a lot of my problem is in my own head.  I know it is going to be mind over matter, or mind over body.  I know I am capable, but I’m just getting in my own way.  I can do this.  Whether I hit the road again before my race or not, I am capable.  I just have to keep reminding myself, I can do this.  I am strong and I’m certainly stronger than I was 3 months ago.  I’ve got this…right?

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Posted by on September 23, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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Run Baby Run

I’ve been doing some pretty serious run procrastinating.  I have a 5K at the end of this month and it’s probably going to be my last shot at running the entire thing.  I have a goal for this year to run an entire 5K (without stopping at all to walk).  I have done 4 5k’s this year, but have walked at least a little bit in all of them.

For the last, probably 2 months, I have managed to get my exercise, without once hitting the road to run.  With my 5K only 3 weeks away, I knew I had to get to it or I was never going to.  Yesterday, after posting a status about it on Facebook, my sister asked me if we could run together.  So off we went.

I was amazed first at how ok I was with running a mile without stopping, then surprised to realize, while I would once go about 2.5 miles without stopping to walk, 1.25 miles, was once again my limit.  It was a rude awakening that if I’m going to accomplish my goal, and I will accomplish my goal; that I need to hit the pavement a bit more.  So I’ve planned it out.  I have scheduled in a run 2 days a week leading up to my 5K.  I know that’s not a lot, but with zumba 3 days a week and TRX 2 days a week (2 workouts that I love and am not willing to break from to run) it’s what I have time for.  I’m confident I can get there, as long as I can get myself up off the couch to actually do it!

P.S. I’m super proud of my sis.  She hasn’t been running, and she did great on our 2.5 mile excursion and motivated me to pick up the pace on more than one time on our run!

 
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Posted by on September 10, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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Why do I Dread Running?

I’ve signed up for one more 5K this fall.  Since I’ve been focusing my workouts on Zumba and TRX I haven’t gone out for a run of more than a few hundred feet (we do that at TRX) in about 2 months.  With my 5K only a couple weeks away, I had decided to get back to it.

This week is break week at the Y that I go to.  They take the week off from all classes, so I thought, what a great chance to get back to running.  Now here I am, it’s Friday, and I haven’t been once.  Last night I got out of work in time, had about an hour before I had to pick up my husband or my kids, and I had an argument with myself in my head for about 20 minutes before the lazy side of my brain won out, and I sat on my couch doing nothing instead.

I don’t now why I dread running so much.  The thought of putting on my workout clothes and going to use the elliptical, or go to zumba or TRX; no problem.  Getting on my running shoes to actually go run, is a whole other story.

Maybe it’s because I know as soon as I start, I’m going to want to stop.  Maybe it’s because I know my lungs are going to hurt and the sweat is going to pour off my like crazy.

But why can’t I get past that?  I have before, and every time after I run I feel so accomplished. I’ve been gradually getting faster and it earns me a ton of activity points.  It’s just getting out of my own head about how terrible I am at it and how miserable I’m going to be while doing it.

With only a couple more days left in break week, I’m making a promise to myself that tomorrow morning, before my husband leaves for work, I will get up and I will run at least 2 miles…unless I mange to come up with some other excuse not to between then and now…

 
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Posted by on September 6, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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Really Hit the Ground Running

The other day I went out for a run for the first time in over 3 weeks.  I shocked myself at how I did.  I was expecting to be dragging but I pushed myself and I felt great afterwards.

My exercise routine was a little thrown off this week because my hubby and I went to a concert on Friday night.  That meant no zumba.  I had told myself I would get up on Friday morning and run.  That didn’t happen.  I’m just not a morning workout person.  Don’t get me wrong, I can hit the gym in the morning, I just can’t haul my butt out of bed to do it.

So I decided to do a 5k on Saturday morning.  It was a spur of the moment decision, but I knew if I didn’t do it, I wouldn’t get my exercise in and then I would feel crumby all weekend.  So I laced up my shoes and headed out.

It was hot.  Not super hot, prob 70-75 but in the sun I was sweating before the race even started.  I was feeling a little intimidated knowing it was a hilly run.  Even the experienced runners were talking about the steep hills.  Let’s just say I was not expecting much.  My goal for the day was to beat the time from my last 5k, and since it was my worst 5k time, I figured I should be able to do that.

I have an app on my phone that tells me how far I’ve gone, how long and my average mile pace.  The first time her voice toned out at the 5 minute marker, I thought she must have been tracking someone else.  My fastest mile time has been about 13:30-14 minutes.  She said my average mile time was 12:28 seconds.  I was certain she was wrong.  Of course I slowed down as I went and hit that 13-14 minute average soon there after, but at that point I didn’t even feel like I was running any harder or faster than any other time.

The hills were most definitely brutal.  This was not my race to run the entire distance without stopping to walk.  I have gone more than 2 miles without stopping to walk and I barely made it to 1.5.  The turn around was right after a brutally steep hill and I managed to run up half of it but I knew if I didn’t walk, I might not live through the rest of the race (of course that’s an exaggeration but at the time a perfectly logical excuse).  I slowed to walk a couple more times after that.  I wish I hadn’t stopped the first time since it was so much harder getting started again after that, but when I finished the race I was proud of myself.

I shaved more than 6 minutes off my last 5k time and more than minutes off my fastest.  While 43:34 is not fast to a lot of runners, it is to me.  I have been amazed by that time since Saturday, and while I have never been a runner and always dreaded it, I’m really starting to love the accomplishment I feel when I meet or exceed a goal I set for myself. 

 
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Posted by on June 25, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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On the Run Again

The last few weeks have been crazy busy for us.  Moving has been an easy excuse for me to skip out on my runs.  I’ve managed (for the most part) to keep up with my workouts, but it has been over 3 weeks since I have even attempted to go for a run.  There have been a couple of times I’ve said i was going to try, but it got pushed back by one excuse or another.

I had come so far in the time I was running (far for me, anyway) and when I forced myself out the door, I thought I was going to have lost all the progress I had made.  Before my hiatus, I was running 2 miles at a time, not fast, but running.  In the new place we’re living, it is really easy to just walk out the door and run. 

So that is what I did last night when my hubby got home from work.  It was starting to get dark, but I decided the most it would be is 30 minutes and that was plenty of time.  I had made excuses long enough.

I found myself back in a similar position as a few months ago.  I took about 5 steps and wanted to stop.  I quite honestly thought about turning around after less than a quarter of a mile.  It Sucked!  My legs started to hurt, my lungs were burning and I was less than 5 minutes it.  There was no way I was going to make it a mile, much less 2. 

Then oddly enough, it got better.  Once I made up my mind I was not turning around until it got too dark for safety it was almost as it the suck was a little less.  I broke my own record for my fastest mile time since high school.  It was laughable to most runners (13:53), but it was less than 14 minutes and considering the last 5k I did, took me more than 48 minutes, that’s not bad at all. 

My run keeper app has been a great motivation for me and as always once I hit the mile marker, I slowed down (probably before that, but anyway).  So when my app went off saying my average mile time was 14:07, I wasn’t surprised, but I decided I didn’t wanted to finish strong.  I made a goal for myself to have my average time be faster in the next 5 minutes than it was at the 15 minute mark.

So I did my best to maintain my speed and I’m pretty sure I looked a bit like Rocky when my app went off saying at 20 minutes my average time was faster, barely, but faster (14:03)!!!!

So I kept going.  I started using the cracks in the road to motivate me.  I’d jog one at a normal pace, and dig hard through the next one.  It made the time go by faster, and when my app went off at 25 minutes, my average mile time was 13:56!  I was psyched.  I was exhausted, but I was super psyched. 

I didn’t make it the 2 miles I wanted to.  It got dark and towards the end of my run my I was questioning my safety.  I made it 1.85 miles.  Not bad for having not run in more than 3 weeks.

And while I started out my door dreading going, I had fun trying to beat my own time.  I was proud of myself when I walked through the door (TMI alert: and I was so sweaty, my husband asked me if it has started raining).  Not only that, but according to my app, when I finished I was on a pace of a 12:49 mile.  That is amazing for me since I ran a 12 minute mile in high school.  I proved to myself, my body is capable and I can do more than I think I can.  I was convinced I wouldn’t make it a mile and I made it almost 2 in my best time since I started running.  And I proved that the excuse I was trying to make (it’s been so long and I’m not going to be able to go as far as I did before) is not acceptable and when you set your mind to something, it’s not necessary.

 
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Posted by on June 19, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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Reminded What it’s All About

Yesterday I got to spend a wonderful Mother’s Day with my boys.  The day started with breakfast in bed made by my hubby and my oldest son (after about 5 minutes of “cooking” he came upstairs and climbed into bed with me and watched a movie). 

After a breakfast of egg whites and homemade home-fries, we got ready and headed to my parent’s so we could go to church with them.  After church we spent some time having lunch with my mom and dad, my grandmother and my sister and her family.  After lunch the kids played for a bit, then we headed for home.

We were planning to spend some time at home before heading to my in-laws, but on the way home, the kids both fell asleep.  I had told my husband the night before that I really just wanted to make sure I was able to go for a run.  Since my in-laws live down a dirt road, we decided to head to their house earlier than we planned and to go running there.  My husband also decided he was going to run with me.

When we got changed and ready to run, my 4 year-old was really upset.  He really wanted to go with us, but since the distance we were planning was 2.4 miles, we didn’t think it was such a good idea.  I was filled with guilt as we walked out the door, with him standing in the window, waving with tears running down his cheeks.  I kept thinking, “This is Mother’s Day.  I’m supposed to be spending time with my kids,” but I decided it was only 2.4 miles, so it wouldn’t be that much time that we’d be gone. 

It was really nice to run with my husband.  It was certainly a first!  He kept his pace a little (or a lot) slower so he didn’t get too far ahead of me. 

The furthest I had gone without stopping to walk was a little over 1 1/2 miles, so the 2.4 was quite a task for me and I’m sure had I gone by myself, without my husband’s encouragement, I probably wouldn’t have made it the entire 2.4 miles, but I did!

A little over halfway through our run, I got some additional encouragement.  My father-in-law brought our son out to meet us on their golf cart.  When he saw us, he hopped out and ran with us for a few minutes.  While all 3 of us were running together, I was reminded how important being a good role model for my boys is.  I may have had to leave him for a few minutes, but he is getting excited to exercise with us.  He may have only run for a few minutes, then stopped to walk and throw rocks, but he saw his mom and dad working together, working out and wanted to be a part of it. 

It was such a special moment for me.  I forgot all about the sad eyes that watched me leave and saw an energetic little boy smiling and running.  This is not something I would have imagined a Sunday looking like for our family 6 months ago.  I’m looking forwards to turning more lazy Sundays with my boys into a chance to be active as a family.

 
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Posted by on May 13, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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Winning in Last Place

My main goal since I started doing 5ks (finished my third today) was not to come in last.  I think that is why I was so worried about my race today.  I have completed 2 races before this and have not come in last, that being said, I believe the only people who finished behind me in both races were walkers, but either way, I wasn’t last.  Today’s race was different.  They had the walkers start about 15 minutes before the runners.

At first I couldn’t decide which group to go with.  I eventually went with the runners because I knew if I went with the walkers I would do just that, walk.  I knew I wouldn’t event try to run, so I decided the only way I was going to push myself was to go with the runners.

I started towards the back of the pack and that is where I stayed.  The gap between me and the rest of the runners just kept getting bigger and bigger.  After only a few minutes it was obvious I was going to be the last runner finished, so instead of focusing on that, I had to turn my attention to other things.

First off, there are so many people who were standing at the finish line of the Boston Marathon who will never be able to run again.  So many people who would give so much just to be able to maintain the slow jog that I do.  I am capable, and that is what matters first and foremost.

Second, the furthest I have gone without stopping to walk is 1 mile (and I’ve only done that once a couple days ago).  I decided to focus my attention on being able to make it further than that.  I made it all the way to the half way mark and kept going.  In fact, I’m pretty sure I only walked maybe 7 telephone polls.

It wasn’t a fast pace.  In fact, I added about 30 seconds to my time from my last race, and added about 10 seconds to my first 5k time.  I came in last place and I took longer to run the course, it would be easy for me to convince myself, I had failed.  But I didn’t.  I think today was my best race so far.  I’m pretty certain if I measured it out, I probably ran (jogged) almost 3 times.  I set goals for myself, then I exceeded them.  I started out wanting to make it to 1 mile without stopping to walk, then the turn around and I made it there and then some.  I walked for 3 telephone polls and decided I would run to the corner, and I got to the corner and kept going, probably another mile.  I conquered my fear of finishing last.  I finished strong, and for the first time today, I didn’t have a finish line team to come out and run the last stretch with me.  I did it on my own.  They were there cheering me on, but it was me who motivated myself.

Don’t get me wrong, I was disappointed when I heard my time at the finish line, but today I know I did the best that I could and that is more than good enough for me.  I don’t know when my next race will be, but I know what my goal for it is.  My goal before the end of the summer was to be able to complete a 5k without walking, and whenever my next race is, that’s what I’m going to do.  It makes me pretty happy that I was so close to that today in my 3rd ever 5k.  I will accomplish my goal.  It won’t matter if I’m last, second to last or if I manage to finish better than that.  What will matter is that I stayed true to myself and shattered the goals I have set for me.

I follow a Women of Crossfit page that while I don’t do Crossfit I find to be very inspiring.  Earlier this week they posted a picture with this caption, “it’s often the people who are “slowest” who think so poorly of themselves.. But you know what?! Those are the people who have the ability to inspire WAY more than the fastest person.. Why?! Because they are out there, doing what they need to do to be healthy! Don’t give up or think less if yourself if you’re last at a WOD (running or not)… You are THERE. Which is more than all the obese people sitting on their asses can say! Be proud – first to finish or last!”  I’m pretty sure this caption and the picture that went with it, was for me.

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Here is the picture that went with the caption on the Women of Crossfit page.

 
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Posted by on April 20, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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